The last time I saw my husband was in September 2022 at the airport. A lot of the changes we went through over the past one to two years have been separate. One part about long-distance relationships that might be hard to navigate is sex. My partner suggested we could try sexting, but I don’t enjoy it. So there has been a lot of back-and-forth about that. Connecting via phone calls has also been difficult because of the different time zones. When I am sleeping, he is calling. When he is sleeping, that is when I have time to call. So we just call at random times and hope the other person answers. But if we have to discuss something important, we schedule a call. Personally, I can do another year of long distance. But my partner cannot. That’s why he has applied for a visitor visa to join me. We thought it would be faster than the work permit, but they even gave him the work visa first. He is touchy and likes familiar faces. He just has to see me. I have to see him, too. I miss him a lot. My head itches often and he is the only person who knows how to rub and scratch it perfectly. I miss all those small things with him. I can do a long-distance relationship because I’m not much of a touchy person. Also, the type of birth control method I’m on makes it easier for me to stay without sex. Before, my partner wasn’t so enthusiastic about immigration because he is very family-oriented. And because of his autism, he can only accommodate a few people. He doesn’t like strangers or seeing new faces, and he would have to put up with that as an immigrant. What made him change his view about moving was the worsening economy. He now spends a lot of money on food, electricity, and transportation and thinks staying back in Nigeria is not worth it anymore. Even my own monthly electricity bill is not up to his. My long-term goal is to just get my permanent residence and citizenship. After that, I think I want to go to a place in Africa to build whatever I want to build.
As narrated by: IFEOLUWA (TORONTO)
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