The first time I considered Japa was in 2018, when I graduated. I was the second person in the history of the Department of History to finish with a first class. The first person was INEC chairman Professor Mahmud Yakubu, who graduated 33 years earlier. The news went viral and many people studying in North America offered to get me a PhD admission abroad. I wrote the GRE and TOEFL the following year, but I did not gain admission because my recommendation letter was turned in after the deadline. Then, my father passed away, and I became reluctant to apply again. One time, a friend angrily told me, ‘History will never forgive you if you remain in Nigeria because you have all it takes to move out.’ When I graduated, people promised that they would get me a well-paying job after my NYSC. But when I finished the programme, all I could get was a really low-paying state government job. I went into research consultancy with different individuals and institutions. I was waiting for jobs; the people who promised me even stopped answering my calls. I started rethinking my future in Nigeria and began to reconsider applying to graduate schools in the US and Europe.
In February 2023, I got an email from Northwestern University that it was offering me a PhD admission. But at this time, I now had a decent job. The truth is, even after I got my visa, I was honestly not desperate to leave. I was doing well. The only thing that worried me was the insecurity. It was really expanding. One thing I know is I cannot be in Nigeria and stay in one place. I’m the type who’s always on the road. I have family in Sokoto, Kaduna, and Katsina. I was also alternating between Minna and Abuja. So, besides the rising insecurity, I was fine. I was financially stable. I continued to have mixed feelings. On one part, I was excited to explore other parts of the world, gain experience, and get a PhD — which has always been my dad’s dream. On the other hand, I was anxious about leaving my comfort zone, my family. I shared my anxiety with some people, and it made me understand what Nigerians actually think about Nigeria. Many of them said, ‘What, are you mad? Why would you have second thoughts when you have this opportunity? Do not even dare it; you have to go!’ When I finally booked my flight, it was just two weeks to my departure.
As narrated by: UMAR (CHICAGO, US)
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